I often sit and think about what it is I want from this life. Turns out that most of the time I am always envisioning the perfect side of life and what I need to do to get there. I "think" I want the "perfect" body, the "perfectly" kept home, the "perfect" menu plan, the "perfect" pet , the "perfect" children....it really is endless in the scheme of things.
So what is perfect anyway? The dictionary says it means free from flaws, precisely accurate, and as good as it is possible to be. That leaves many different interpretations. I think I try to achieve the free from flaws and precisely accurate one and usually that proves impossible. This leads to a pattern of beginning my new "perfect" life over and over with all the guilty sprinklings in between when I fail to achieve the "flawless" life. This leaves me to ponder, maybe I can just try to be as good as it is possible to be...meaning what is possible for me and my life. We all have different responsibilities and obligations in our daily lives. What my day looks like is very different from my friends' life, or my neighbors' life or even my husbands' life. The quest for perfection has to be adapted to fit into your unique situation. I think the problem with perfection is that we look to a one size fits all model. It is like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Impossible. It will never work and that will lead to a further frustration as we keep trying to attain that which is unattainable.
Weekend days I usually sit and sip my coffee and I am thinking that I should be doing this or that and that I am letting time go by without being productive. All week long I have to follow a schedule....a certain time to get up, get showered, get to work, get the dinner on the table....so why is it that on my weekends I feel the same internal pressure to keep to a schedule. The pressure to not waste any precious time that could be spent on "perfecting" my house, "perfecting" my plans for this life. I think we have been conditioned to think that we must be busy all the time and if we are not in constant motion that we have failed. Why can't I just relax on a weekend and be still? Be still in mind as well as body. Why is it so hard for me to just take time to just enjoy the fact that I really have no schedule that I must follow. The house is not perfect and even if I spend every waking hour trying to achieve that perfection, it really is unattainable. There will always be something to do, to fix, to plan, to wash, to put away, to cook, etc etc. So I am working today on giving myself permission to breathe and be happy that I have this precious time to do what I want, not what I have to do. What I want to do may well be the laundry or some cleaning but I can do it on my time and what doesn't get done does not mean failure.
I am striving to be the "perfect" that is possible for me, including learning to relax and be still. Make every day great and be good to yourselves, and remember it is okay to go off schedule when that is possible and it also okay to enjoy that special time.
